What would Karl Pilkington do?

Writing about travel and the Spinx Effect the other night put Karl Pilkington back in my head. And now I can't get him out.

Every now and then you watch a show on television that stays with you. LOML and I nearly choked laughing at An Idiot Abroad on SBS a little while back. For the sake of the children, it got to the point where, like plane travel, we considered whether it might be best if we watched the show separately.


We got sucked into what was really a very long, very involved, rather absurd practical joke disguised as a travel show. Ricky Gervais and Steve Merchant sent their morose, 'everyman' mate, Karl Pilkington, well out of his comfort zone and around the Seven Wonders of the World. He's the sort of guy who you could imagine living his whole life within a 2 block radius of where he grew up. It's nice there, why would you go any further?

Clearly, he was never meant to travel. He is obviously intelligent, but he's funny because he is so utterly unadabtable to the situations he finds himself in. He's a lot like the Blues Point Tower on Sydney Harbour, actually.

I think his honesty is what makes him such an unlikely star. We're not used to seeing someone on the tele who calls a spade a spade. Doesn't want to talk it into being a shovel. Doesn't want to dress it up with a bow. It's just a spade - what's wrong with that?  He is keenly observant and responds to the world without any trace of irony or filter. The world comes to Karl, he doesn't go to the world. Of the Great Wall of China he said "not that great, to be honest – if I named it, it’d be the All right Wall" and "Just goes for miles and miles....but so does the M6." You can find many other classic 'Karls' here. He's such a phenomenon that he even has his own 'Pilkipedia'.


He is indeed an unlikely poet. Karl is basically what would happen if you stripped away every trace of political correctness or cultural understanding in the world and then made the world about five years old. While most of us are adaptable chameleons, Karl is a dugong.

Karl would definitely understand the Sphinx Effect. I think Karl's whole life is probably best described by the Sphinx Effect. This is the man who decided not to walk the last 100 metres to stand at Machu Picchu because "the view is better from here". He is both refreshing and depressing in equal parts. Refreshing because it's just so grand to see someone so blatantly honest and unbound by societal convention (and he's funny, whether intentional or not). Depressing because, well, he really, really is.

Have you met Karl?

Do you find him oddly refreshing?

Do you know anyone like Karl? Can I meet them?

[Image can be found here]

The Sphinx Effect

All this talk on my blog about what's 'real'. I remember when LOML and I first saw The Sphinx in Egypt and it was beyond disappointing. You know how you see all those Egyptian photos like this...





... and the Sphinx looks really enormous?


Well, it's not.


It's only about the size of a truck - a bit bigger than dump truck, a bit smaller than a Pajero. Having associated this gigantic Sphinx with the majesty of Egypt for so long it was... disappointing to find that one could walk around it in about 15 seconds. The pyramids were at least 100 times bigger.

From that moment on when something on our travels did not live up to its reputation, we decided it was suffering from "The Sphinx Effect".

The Sphinx Effect was in operation across the world.

Big Ben was... just a clock and not a particularly big one at that. Having viewed it for herself and finding it afflicted by The Sphinx Effect, my mother continues to call it 'Little Ben' to this day.

Have you ever been to the Pantheon in Rome?

It looks like a building worthy of some space and landscaping, right? Sadly it's actually cramped into the busiest piazza imaginable and the stunning view above is achieved through the doors of the Maccas 5 metres across the road.

While there are many, many other examples of the Sphinx Effect in operation, we'll stay in Italy and visit the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

Again, looks huge. Reality is that it is just a rather small marble bell tower that was lucky enough to be built on sinking land. Due to the Sphinx Effect and the fact that the attraction is plagued with health and safety issues, I am worried that its days as a popular tourist destination may be numbered.

The Manneken Pis, Den Lille Havfrue, Stonehenge, the Spanish Steps, Venus de Milo... and The Sphinx Effect is not even exclusive to the not-so-wonders of the world. So much of life is afflicted by it. A longed for party that turns out to be excruciatingly dull? Sphinx Effect. A 'you've got to meet her, you'll really, really like her' person* who you 'really, really don't'? Sphinx Effect.

I could go on. Let's face it, life is disappointing and the Sphinx Effect is rampant. 

Have you had any memorable encounters?

* It is my experience that whenever someone says this to you about someone, you really must go out of your way not to meet them. It never ends well.

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Edited at 9.45pm: I originally published this post with Sphinx spelt incorrectly as Spinx no less than THIRTEEN times.  I don't think I need to explain why I changed it...

[Den Lille Havfrue image from here; Sphinx image by Jerry Burns; Little Ben found here; View of the Pantheon from Maccas found here; Pisa leaning from here]  

On the road again

Imagine my joy when LOML turned to me earlier this year and said "Where are you going on your annual road trip this year?"

It's annual! My once-in-a-lifetime escape by myself  is actually annual!

He's a good man, my man. He understands me and he knows how to make me sing.

The question remained: where am I going to go this year?

I'm heading out towards the end of July and I've always wanted to go to Tassie, so that was on the cards. I planned to visit Jane in Hobart and then mosey around the coast a little bit. But then LOML and I decided that we want to go to Tasmania for the first time as a family, so I've parked that idea for later in the year.

So now, I'm driving from Sydney to Daylesford and poking around there before driving home. A trip like that is going to be inspiration, creativity and promise all wrapped up in a handmade rug to warm the soul.

 Any suggestions on where to stay, where to visit, what to do? I'm all excited ears!

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Edited on 2.6.2011

Just wanted to say OF COURSE I'll be giving big smooches to Allison at Lark whilst in Daylesford (I am an avid eshopper already!). And I would have been having a cuppa at Kate's place too, but she'll be inconveniently off having a marvellous caravanning hol with the fam...

[Image by Margaret Metcalfe]

Things I learned this week including how much I love a wedding (budget)

1. Winter is the perfect time for a swim. Going with my kids don't melt theme, on the first day of August we allowed them to strip off to their undies and wade into the (it has to be said) rather icy waters at Greenwell Point on Sunday. Swinging from the mangroves, wading knee deep to catch tiny crabs, the Tsunamis and their cousin were embracing their kidhood with a relish that made my heart sing.

2. A simple car game makes the journey go-'round. We played '500 points if you spot a yellow car' and the Tsunamis were quiet and happy for at least 50kms. Hardly any fights (luckily none of them can count past about 25 so we pretty much had the floor).

3. And frankly, there just aren't enough yellow cars on the road these days. Whatever happened to colour*, folks?

4. The fabulous Dawn over at Beat Until Fluffy taught me how to make Sweet Potato Cookies. I'm yet to bake them, but any treat incorporating hidden vegetables is a treat indeed.

5. Modern Family is my new best show. It never fails to crack me up. Now, I'm a bit nervous at how much I can relate to these crazy characters, but they're entertaining just the same.

6. Models should not speak. Ever. No good can come of it. Gisele Bundchen's ode to 'it's called labor not holiday' was so irritatingly smug I just want to throw her in her Prada nappy bag and run over her with a Bugaboo Pram. And be warned: she has a new blog.

7. People are so kind and forgiving. We took an extra day on Monday so we could stay with Gran and Pops a bit longer down the coast. I let the school know, I let the daycare know... I forgot to let the after-school care people know and I also forgot about The Slowest Boy in the World who Annabelle collects from after-school care on Mondays. A frantic call from TSBITW's mum at 5pm and the sudden realisation that TSBITW was still at after-school care as dark descended, had me worried that the support chain might be compromised. I needn't have worried, they saw the funny side. How I love them.

8. I love weddings. Now, hear me out. It's not about the big frocks, it's about the big budgets. I don't care what the bride wears, but I do care what stationery she chose and I'm more interested in how she did the tables than her hair (or the groom, for that matter). Check out Snippet and Ink for lashings of creativity.

9. "If you take too long in deciding what to do with your life, you'll find you've done it." -George Bernard Shaw

10. Charlie and Lola are quite possibly the best role models for brothers and sisters everywhere. We adore them in Maxabellaland.

Did you learn anything exciting this week? Was it a good one?

PS - Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, I look like a monkey and I'm mum to another three.

* Says she of the dark grey Ford Terror.


[Image from Snippet & Ink]

This Saturday I'm grateful for... grandparents!

Here in Maxabellaland, Saturday is traditionally a sport, shop, sort the clothes, sweep the floors, strangle the Tsunamis (insert other 's' words here - no pun intended) kinda day. But on Maxabella loves... I thought it would be grounding to make Saturday my 'grateful' day.

I'm writing this post in advance (it's Monday, I'm organised!) as this weekend we are off down the coast to visit Gran and Pops. They only live about 3 hours drive away, but we haven't been down since Anzac Day (and even then G and P were actually off on holiday themselves). So, it's been since Christmas time that we've been at Gran and Pops' place while G and P were actually there. Crazy!

The Tsunamis talk the entire 3 hours drive. Maxi-Taxi, in particular, is fond of a story and will not draw breath the entire journey. I've learnt to tune them out while I drive The Terror along the freeway, but the chattering is still headache inducing and I generally arrive in a somewhat crazed state. But there's nothing like coming back to the home I grew up in and, as ever, when your mum is around you're not the main mum. She lifts the burden of parenting just by being there.  A more experienced mum than yourself, she can be relied on to be the one who knows what needs to be done. Instant relaxation!

So, this Saturday I'm grateful for...

1. Grandparents - in all their loving glory.

2. The excited cry of 'there's a cow, mummy!' from the backseat of The Terror, which, aside from being just plain cute, signals that there will finally be more interesting stuff out the window than strip malls, boring bush or freeway to distract the Tsunamis for the rest of a long journey.

3. Weekend breaks - same shite, different location, I know. But a welcome break from routine all the same.

What's making you happy today?

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Ms Nosybella: have you ever...?

Nosybella's baaaack. Asking all the questions, begging for all the answers.

Today I'm all about life experiences and the many little past yous that add up to a whole today you. So, I'm asking, have you ever (my evers in brackets)...

lived overseas? (Four years in London with LOML in my late twenties. Good times.)

hitch-hiked? (Most of the way around France and parts of Ireland. Remind me to tell you about the time the busker with the manequin picked us up outside Roussilion.)

bought a self-help book? (Dr Phil takes pride of place on my shelf. You can't change what you don't acknowledge, people.)

skinny-dipped? (Many times, but privately. Is that the same?)

tried accupuncture? (Needle-phobic, but so desperate for back-pain relief during pregnancy that I tried it and I liked it.)

had a one night stand? (Seemingly a necessary part of growing up in Sydney in the nineties.)

re-gifted? (Often, a great way to recycle!)

loved somebody so much it makes you cry?  (Having a Brandy moment there... and the answer is I've wept)

Have you ever... shared?

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Things I learned this week including a well known truism

It's been a big week and my learnings are varied.

1. Better late than never!

2. A hagiologist chronicles the lives of saints.

3. If you discover a word that you have never seen before like hagiologist, you will invariably stumble over it time and time again in the next 48 hours.

4. Sitting in a peaceful, beautiful garden, reflecting on the road behind and the road ahead is the best form of meditation there is.

5. The GPS Navman lady is very bossy and if you disobey her stern warnings she will lead you in a merry circle as punishment.

6. There isn't a town on the East Coast of Australia that doesn't have a chinese restaurant.

7. The official ski season starts in the Snowy Mountains next weekend.

8. The paintings in the National Gallery of Australia's Masterpieces from Paris exhibition somehow looked even more interesting and vibrant than when I saw them all shuffled together at the Musee d'Orsay. Perhaps this is due to the 'important exhibition' nature of the NGA's showing.

9. I love an open road.

10. There is no place more exciting, more inspiring, more fun or more delicious than home.

Foxglove Inspires

The drive today was true happiness. I stopped at many little towns - Milton, Mogo, Tilba Tilba, Narooma, Bermagui. There are so many special places to visit.

I spent a really lovely morning poking around all the shops and eating lunch at one of the sweet cafes at Central Tilba. It's one of the best preserved 'historical trust' villages that I've seen and it has all the requisite craft shops, lolly shops, wooden toy shops, candle shops that you'd expect. The town sits in a breath-taking valley and beautiful mature trees dripped golden leaves all over the streets and the smell of woodsmoke made time stand still.

Foxglove Spires is an open garden in Tilba Tilba. Clever owner Susan Southam wrote "Velvet Pears" about her time developing the garden. I found such beauty and peace there that I couldn't tear myself away. I spent twice as long as I expected wandering the winding paths and watching the chickens and doves scratch about.

They also have the best shop. I went a bit nuts getting little trinkets and things for the garden. I think I might take after my mum (who's a bit of a bower bird when it comes to ornaments). But what can you do when every single thing in the store makes you genuinely happy just looking at it?

As a result of my lingering day, I've changed my game plan and have stopped in Bega for the night. Instead of my always-driving ambition to head down the bottom of Victoria and across to the Daylesford, I'm going to do a loop along the Snowy Mountains Highway thorough Cooma, Canberra, Yass and the Southern Highlands. This way I'll have a lot more time for play.

It's not about the drive

I'm off on an adventure. Alone. For four days and four nights.

Thanks to the enormous generosity of always-supportive LOML, I'll be driving down the east coast of NSW, then across to Daylesford in Victoria and back up to Sydney via Bendigo. It's a big drive and it may change en-route, but to be honest, it doesn't matter where I go, just that I go. Alone.

There have been two schools of opinion on this one. First there is the 'oh my god, I'm so jealous, I wish I was doing that' school. They get that it's not about the drive. It's about the opportunity to do what I want, when I want and for as long as I want.  If you ask me, when you're a wife and a mumma and at the end of some days you've done so much talking in your work and real life that you are literally all talked out, being alone is the ultimate luxury.

Then there's the 'don't you want to take a friend?' school.

Now, I'm a social creature, don't get me wrong. I come alive in large groups of people and I love to talk and talk and talk. Love sharing a story, having a cuddle, showing off, listening to a problem, debating the universe and sorting out just exactly what needs to be done about that Shari-Lea.

But I really, really don't want to take a friend.

Cheers to thinking uninterrupted thoughts and spur of the moment stop offs. To arrivals and departures whenever it suits me. To suddenly taking a left hand turn to see what's down the road.  To listening to the music that I want to listen to or to no music at all. To staying a bit too long at a gallery or lingering in a bookstore.

Cheers to the beauty of solitude.

[Image: photo-alchemy.co.uk]